This is something that came up in a conversation I was having with Servitob a few weeks ago and is something of a revelation to myself considering how slow I am at getting stuff done and the level to which I aspire.
Servitob and I are at somewhat opposite ends of the painting scale, that’s not to say that I’m a master painter and his stuff looks like it was done with a roller but the aesthetic we each are happy with is rather different. Servitob likes playing with painted armies so will ensure that it happens, therefore he is a master speed painter where stuff looks good enough to be acceptable tabletop quality and he is happy with that.
While I am not going to win a Golden Daemon I want my army to show what I can do, sometimes this means it may look like I have tried to put it on with a roller but I know the techniques I can use and the standard I can achieve if I really knuckle down to it.
However, because I know what I can do and how I want to do it I am fine with getting all the base colours down and painting in between the lines as it were, but then I get scared of actually doing what I can. Weird huh? Sometimes this leads me to changing what I want to do to get stuff finished, this can be seen in my War of the Ring models. Rather than spending the time doing all the highlighting I want I miss steps out and shortcut myself. This means that things end up looking not quite as good as I could do.
What worries me is that I could make a mistake with it. Now, models are easy enough to strip and/or repaint and no-one is really going to chew me out over a botched highlight, but this fear of failing is what is now holding me back from getting a job done. Rather than spending my time painting my little soldiers I will find something else to do, something that will take me away from having to paint and thereby avoiding the chance of failure. This is of course rather unhealthy and will not lead to me ever getting anything finished, clearly an unacceptable position to be in.
Last night I took some decisions regarding just what I was going to do with my Dark Eldar. I have my army list worked out now, it’s dramatically different to the first list I ever designed but I think it will work quite nicely. Now I’ve done that I know what I am going to be painting and now is the time to knuckle down and start to get through it. I have ideas for tying the disparate parts of my army through into one coherent theme all that’s left is for me to complete the test model (shading now done) and go from there. Who knows, at some point I may have a fully painted army for a change…